Baby Health in Winter
Life is coming full circle for Jana Kramer.
Back in 2010, the singer and actress, 36, wrote and recorded a song titled “Untouchable,” all about looking for lasting love as a single woman. Now married with two kids, Kramer — who released the track for the first time on Friday — says she’s found exactly that with her husband of almost five years, former NFL player Mike Caussin.
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“For my single folks who are looking for love, don’t settle and know there is great love out there,” Kramer tells PEOPLE. “I wrote this song because I was looking for someone that would be there for me and with me through all the hard stuff. I think the message — especially [as it relates to] my marriage — is to have love where nothing can break it. It’s untouchable. The stress and the anxiety and the fears and everything that’s going on, it’s not going to break us.”
Kramer re-recorded “Untouchable” about a month ago, and though she had plans to release it later this year, the ongoing novel coronavirus (COVID-19) outbreak changed things.
“I wanted this song to come out now,” she says. “Obviously the title is cliché because it’s ‘Untouchable,’ and we can’t touch things. But with the pandemic and everything that’s going on, it’s just knowing that even though we can’t physically hold our loved ones and give them hugs and embrace them, that love is beyond any physical connection. It’s there, it’s spiritual and it’s a part of your soul. Love is untouchable.”
Kramer says she and Caussin, 33, as well as their 4-year-old daughter Jolie and 16-month-old son Jace, have been social distancing at their home in Nashville amid the pandemic and are “hanging in there” like the rest of the world.
“We’re healthy, and that’s the greatest news,” she says. “We’re wanting this to be over. The only thing I think I’m really struggling with is … I just miss interaction. I miss my friends, I miss hugging, I miss my family. But it’s great to be able to be really present with the kids during this time, and I’m just trying to find the positive in all of the chaos.”
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Though Kramer says while Jace “has no idea what’s going on” because of his age, Jolie “is having a really tough time” with the changes.
“She doesn’t understand why she can’t see her friends or why we can’t go to her favorite jump jump place or ice skating,” she says. “She doesn’t understand it, and it’s heartbreaking to see her sad and upset about it because she doesn’t get it. She’s like, ‘Why?’ I’m like, ‘Baby, there’s this virus, and everyone’s sick.’ It’ll be interesting to see if she remembers it at 4.”
In an effort to keep the kids entertained, Kramer says she and Caussin turned their “entire house into a playroom.”
“I’ve let go a little bit and instead of just having the playroom a mess, the house is a mess,” she says. “Mike has this house that he built in the middle of the living room and we’ve got a tent in our master bedroom and we’ve got a ball pit. We’re making anything we can out of a toy. We will turn everything and anything into a toy.”
Jana Kramer, Mike Caussin and their kids Jolie and Jace
And Kramer feels lucky that Jolie and Jace have each other, especially right now.
“I told Mike this the other day, I was like, ‘I find myself watching them play together and being like, I’m so thankful they have each other,’” she says. “Seeing them play together is the cutest thing. They hold hands and spin around in circles. They’re really cute. I’m always like, ‘The way Jace looks at Jolie — find you a brother who looks at you like Jace.’ He’s enamored with her, and it’s just so sweet to see.”
“Jace is teething really bad right now,” she continues. “He’s either teething or is just getting a personality and he doesn’t want to eat certain foods. But Jolie’s been helping him eat so she’ll be like, ‘Jace. Look, yummy!’ She’ll eat it and try to give it to him. She’s so good with him.”
With the two kids running around the house, Kramer admits tensions can sometimes run high between her and Caussin.
“When you’ve got the kids running around and they’re screaming and you’re annoyed because you don’t have your space, you start to get a little agitated,” she says. “Sometimes if you’re not speaking on that agitation, you can start to become passive and then there’s the fight that’s brewing. That definitely hit us where we didn’t communicate great. We have hours and hours and hours that we’ve done therapy and worked on communication but sometimes when you have extra added stress and anxiety and fears, communication can go sideways. I think that’s normal for any couple.”
As she detailed on Instagram and on her podcast last week, Kramer and Caussin recently fought about a shelf.
“Honestly, I realized I’m being the nagging wife,” she says of the situation. “I slipped really easily into that role of just being a really nagging wife. I generally and genuinely ask a lot of questions and I think in this time, I have to acknowledge that and know, like, maybe lean back on the questions because they might frustrate him. We feel like that old married couple that are fighting about mundane things. But if you’re not communicating properly, they’ll come out sideways and you’ll be fighting about a shelf but it has nothing to do with a shelf. It has everything to do with everything else I’ve been dealing with. If you can communicate through it and work through that, that’s the best.”
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No matter what, though, Kramer says she and Caussin (who have weathered their fair share of ups and downs through the years) are “in this together.”
“At the end of the day, we do this thing at dinner time, peaks and valleys,” she says. “One of the sad parts of the days is like, ‘I really hate that we fought today but my happy part of the day is we’re at the dinner table laughing and we’re working through it together and we’re going to be stronger because of it.’ I’m excited to hopefully look past this in a few months and be like, ‘Wow we got through all that together and that just made our love even stronger.’”
Kramer says she and Caussin are also acknowledging each other’s needs at this time.
“[The other night], Mike was like, ‘I want a night to myself. I want a night to play video games with my guys and do whatever I want to do,’” she says. “I’m like, ‘Okay!’ I texted some of my best girlfriends and I was like, ‘You guys want to do a Zoom?’ I’m so excited because I haven’t seen my high school girlfriend in years and now because of this, we’re going to Zoom and talk to each other. So I’m so excited. Being able to find intentional time to reach out to people.”
Mike Caussin and Jana Kramer
Jana Kramer/ Instagram
Over the last month, Kramer has been open on social media about experiencing anxiety during the pandemic. To combat those feelings, she says she’s been playing “spa music” and focusing on the present.
“A lot of times with anxiety it’s about future-tripping or past-tripping,” she says. “To help with my anxiety, I stay really present. I’m like, ‘Okay, today I’m healthy. My kids are healthy. Today we are happy.’ I stay off the news just because the news can make things worse.”
Kramer was shooting a family in Canada with her family last month, just when travel restrictions due to the coronavirus were beginning. Only 48 hours later, they returned home to Nashville.
“If we could go back, I would 100 percent have not gone,” she says. “But I didn’t know. I was doing what I thought was best, and I was doing what I thought was best for my family. I was providing for my family. Looking back, I made the wrong decision but I was listening to the producers, I was listening to the people who said it was okay to travel to Canada.”
“I had a lot of anxiety when I got there, and I knew the second I landed that I made the wrong decision,” she continues. “When we got back home, the weight of anxiety had lifted because I can’t imagine the people that are trapped right now in other countries. So the fact that I’m able to be in my house quarantined is such a blessing, and I’m so happy to be home.”
Kramer hopes she’ll be able to resume filming again next winter, but everything is up in the air at the moment.
“It’s a bummer,” she says. “We’re all experiencing a loss, some more than others. But it’s okay to be bummed about situations we’ve missed out on.”
Also up in the air? A new album.
“It’s such a financial burden,” Kramer says. “I’m not on a label so it would be hard. My dream would be to put out a Christmas album. I love Christmas music so it would be so cool to put out a Christmas album. I would love that. As for my own album, I don’t know. We’ll see!”
As to what she’s most looking forward to when the pandemic is over, Kramer says it’s “hugging people.”
“I love being close, and I’m having anxiety about that now,” she says. “I was telling my husband, as much as I love being in people’s space, I think it’s going to be a weird new normal of connection. That kind of bums me out, but I hope it goes back to normal. I really miss my friends, and I miss my family. I can’t wait to get on a flight and go see my parents. I can’t wait to get on a flight to go see my grandparents. I can’t wait to go out to dinner and be around other people. So many things I’ve taken for granted that I didn’t realize were such a great thing.”
“Untouchable” is available on iTunes and Spotify now.
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